We have always been chanting, “LOVE YOURSELF!” and the internet has an infinite supply of tips and tricks on how to do so. But sadly, for me, how I came into terms on loving myself fully was a journey rather than a quick fix. Here are my “steps” on how I got where I am today --- having myself as my own greatest lover.
#1 Know and accept that at the end of the day, the only person that you have is yourself --- and that is an actual good thing!
You can’t control other people. You can’t fully control the environment and reality (not unless you are Storm or Scarlet Witch of the Marvel Universe). However, what you have full control on is YOU. I have learned this the hard way and I must admit, I am glad I went through all of that.
And what’s wonderful is that DOWN or UP, MEDIOCRITY or IMPECCABILITY, INSPIRATION or DESPERATION you will never (and can never) really abandon yourself. You are stuck with you. Good or bad. Because you can’t really escape it.
But that’s the greatest part about it all. You have you. You are never alone. In fact, if you befriend and fall in love with yourself, you have with you a partner that is so loving, providing and caring --- you will be left wondering what have you been doing all your life!
#2 Recognize that you can actually provide yourself with everything!
Right now as we speak, you are providing yourself with oxygen automatically, your body is adapting to the weather, allowing you to live. You are feeding yourself information as you read every word and your heart, try as you might, is still producing blood all over your veins.
Amazing how even if you don’t know you are providing yourself with the basics to be alive. And that’s just internal!
Did you eat today? How about that? You’ve found food and had the capacity to feed yourself.
Did you buy something you needed today? How about that? You have found a way to get money to purchase something that you need deeply.
Did you walk from one place to another? Amazing is it not? Without thinking, you were able to fulfill your own need of transportation.
You are a great provider! Not only for others, but for yourself. You are naturally self-reliant and you may not even know it!
As I accepted this truth, I felt so full and whole that I have noticed how I am no longer driven to “want” things and found great happiness in what I have right now. I can walk around the mall and not be driven with “gotta have its” or “wish I have that’s”. My “should have bought” thoughts are also no longer a compelling voice.
Not only have I found myself with more savings, but now I am with more possessions that I actually care about. I have never felt more attracted to myself.
#3 Treat yourself like how you want your lover to treat you.
Treat yourself like how you want a lover to treat you. Find yourself sexy. Find yourself beautiful. Think yourself as amazing. Give yourself compliments. Celebrate your own success. Lavish yourself with gifts. Reward yourself. Work hard for the money you need to earn and live. So on and so forth.
If you were your own lover, what would your lover do to you? Things like that.
I personally like to take time out every day in the morning doing a small prayer and reciting a vow dedicating myself to self-love and to myself. I tell myself how beautiful, smart and intelligent I am and how good I am. This always perks my day up.