Let’s face the facts. At times, our head and heart are at constant war for things that we want and need. Our heart is clamoring for something, but our head is telling us something different. Even worse, there are times that BOTH have amazing scenarios for you to choose from. So which one do you choose? The heart or your head?
Earlier, I had an epiphany on discerning my head voice from my heart voice. Which led to me ask --- how can we make our heart and head work together and use it to make our lives better?
Your heart and mind are powerful aspects of you. Both have amazing wisdom to offer and merging it into one unified choice will definitely lead you to a more authentic life to live in. It doesn’t always have to be the battle of both. You’re already faced with conflict. The last thing you need is a divided “army”.
And although the chant of the current generation is to follow your heart or bliss and say that “we will never be wrong if we do so”, doing only that can also be very dangerous --- as much as only using your head.
Let’s say you have found a man who is already in love with another beautiful woman. You saw him and your heart starts pumping. You feel that “he is the one for you”. And despite the pleading of the man that he does not have any feelings for you, you pursue him and keep on pursuing him because “you do feel that you guys are meant to be together”.
Feels like a stalker story huh?
Another example is that you feel passionate about your hobby and decided to follow your heart. You take out a massive loan that looms over your head day and night as you pursue this new passion. Unfortunately, it’s not working out. But your heart is into it so you just keep on taking out a loan after loan to keep on “following your heart”. And the bills start to pile up and suddenly you have awakened --- “did my heart just lead me to a massive debt?”
Not a good look right?
And the reason that both scenarios don’t look good is that the decision is not balanced. It only used ½ of the potential amazing wisdom being offered. In this case, just the heart or mind wisdom.
So how do we merge it? First thing you need to know: what your head lacks, your heart fulfills and vice versa and thank the Universe for that!
Your head recognizes only the present as the result of your past choices and also the opportunity point to shape the future. What it only cares about is how you guys got there, what you have at the moment and how are you guys going to use whatever you have right now, combined with what you know to create a desired future.
Your heart, on the other hand, sees the present as what it really is --- a present moment. It doesn’t care about how it got there or where it will go, but it does care on what it makes you feel right now, which your brain can never process for you. It can recognize an emotion, but let’s face it, you can only really feel in the heart.
Try it. Sit still right now and feel what you are feeling right now. Most probably, you will go “I feel fine.” Now, I want you to think of the last moment you laughed so much. Your heart starts fluttering in happiness right? Then when you think about things that are horrible, your heart goes “hell no.”
That’s how their tandem works. Your heart feels what the head is presenting to herself right now and that is where the power can jump from.
You control your mind, Erzulliesta, which in turn will control how you are feeling right now.
How? You ask. We see it every day.
There are women there who have everything – family, money, power, career and status. Yet at the end of the day, they are still not happy. Then there are women who earn less, but for some magic are able to support her three children on her own without the help of her husband. And you can see that she is definitely happy on how her life turned out.
And the reason for both scenarios existing is the fact that it’s all about your “final judgment” on the situation.
A break up can either be a major life-altering that destroys your whole future or it can become freedom from a bad relationship and an opportunity to find someone who is more suited for you.
A bad job can be viewed as an event that forever shackles you to boredom or it can become an opportunity to learn more about what a great job means for you.
A loss of something that you really want can either be viewed as you not being enough to have it or it can become a moment to appreciate what you have right now.
You see what I mean?
And it is with the “final judgment” of the matter that you actually unify your head and heart. Your mind will present what happened and your heart will feel things, but at the end of the day, you have a choice on how to view it and mold how your mind should think and how your heart would then feel.
Erzullie is an invite-only fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Get invited: www.erzullie.com