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Friday, July 8, 2016


Self-love is such a powerful thing. It can transform, not only your life, but others around you. After all, nothing is more contagious than a euphoria of happiness radiating from a person.

But why do people still shy away from it sometimes? Here are 3 misconceptions about self-love.

#1 Self-love means selfish.

It’s easy why this misconception can happen. After all, self-love is about loving, thinking and caring about yourself. It is about putting you first. And in a society wherein we are programmed to humiliate and lambast those who only think of themselves and praise those who constantly sacrifice their selves for others --- why wouldn’t we think this way?

But there is a difference between self-love and being selfish. Being selfish is about always being concerned on what you are going to get out of a person, object or situation. Being selfish is actually more of an act of “lack” rather than having it all. And as you know, self-love is about having it all. And what we mean by all --- is you!

Loving yourself is about knowing that you are whole and that anything that you get beyond you is just an additional and enriching experience in your life. So every time you reach out to someone, something or some situation, you feel grateful no matter what happens, rather than being concerned on whether or not this will feel a need.

Being in love with yourself is knowing that no matter what happens, whether or not you get something out of this person, object or situation --- you’re still going to be happy because you are whole and you have yourself.

#2 Self-love is being self-conceited. 

Being self-conceited is placing yourself laminated away from other people to the point that NO ONE ELSE IN THIS WORLD EXISTS but you. Only YOU have problems. Only YOU have issues. Only YOU have the achievements. So on and so forth.

Self-love is anything but that. If anything else, self-love actually helps you see more people.

What do we mean by that?

Loving yourself leads to positivity. And guess what? People love to hang around positive people! And even better! Positive people love to hang around even more positive people. Now imagine how that conversation goes. So exhilarating! Now isn’t that more sociable than being “just you?”

With self-love, you open your eyes not only to yourself but to others, while being self-conceited is putting a thousand mirrors only directed to yourself.

#3 Self-love starts by getting your “ideal” self

I constantly hear this from other people, “I will only love my self/life when I am at this point (insert conditions here)”.

Self-love only has one requirement and that is CHOICE. I, myself, was once just like that. But after more than 30 years was I only able to fully understand that all it takes is the choice to do it now. Because truth is, we can be our ideal selves and achieve it, but then again begs the question --- will we really like it?

I was that. I became what I wanted but still I felt so much hatred in my heart for me. After a lot of prodding, reflecting and finally a major breakdown --- I have realized that self-love really is a choice and it’s a choice that I can make right there and right now.

However, it is a choice that you really arrive in. So just be patient and work towards it, one day it will just happen to you!

So, what are you waiting for? Choose self-love today and see where it leads you.


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